Jewelry, Proposals, and Other Weird Stuff.

Interestingly enough, in my first real blog entry, I would like to discuss one of my absolute LEAST favorite things -- jewelry.

Uncomfortable, unnecessary, often gaudy and tasteless, usually used as a symbol for something else entirely (intangible feelings and emotions)... jewelry. And yet, so many people go gaga over it. I just don't understand. Am I missing something? Does wearing expensive pieces of metal really make one more attractive? Perhaps I missed the memo.

I recently read several of the books in the Twilight series (yes, yes, I know -- I'm 22 years old and a recent college grad, I should be dabbling in much more mature fare than this tween vampire romance business, but bare with me) and I was enthralled to find that Stephenie Meyer had written a character just as abhorrently opposed to and uncomfortable with the concept of jewelry as I was. Her heroine, Bella Swan, detests it and avoids it at almost all costs. She protests an expensive ring when she gets married, and is comforted just slightly by the fact that it is a vintage hand-me-down from the early 20th century. The moment she gets engaged, however, she is intensely aware of the presence of the ring on her finger -- even after she takes it off. I like the way Meyer describes her feelings toward it, almost like it possesses her. One small gem -- how does it hold so much power over her? Bella describes the way it makes her feel even when she is not wearing it -- heavy, weighing her down. After she tries it on for the first time, she quickly rips it off and hides it in its box. If you have read the books or know anything about the basic story, the forbidden love between her character and Edward is an extremely strong, passionate love, something that apparently transcends time and cannot be measured against normal (read: human) standards. Knowing that, knowing the love she felt for him -- and yet, still, the feelings she dealt with when he proposed and put the ring on her. I find this very interesting, even though it originates from a piece of teenage escapism. I think I know why it's interesting, too: I have a feeling that if I ever happen to find that person, and am thrust into that strange situation, I will probably feel the same way the heroine feels in that part of the book.

Is a more expensive ring going to more accurately represent your love? For some, I suppose (if you'd like a representative sample, you can visit the Town Center Mall in Boca Raton, Fla. on pretty much any day...) that this might be true. I don't quite understand the thought processes that occur in their heads; every time they glance at their lavish display, do they swell with pride? Do they shove it in everyone's face and act disappointed if the other party has a nonplussed reaction? (Much more on showing off/apathetic reactions later... they fascinate me, probably because I almost always have apathetic reactions to material things)... Does it lose appeal over time? Even if the band remains untarnished and the stones untouched, will it appear as pleasing to the person after they've been through the most awful, difficult parts of marriage?

I know that this is not all women. I know it. Not every woman that is proposed to automatically sees a dollar sign plastered on their new ring. I'm also aware that there are many different types of proposals, from casual to completely overdone. Some people (like my parents) simply talk about getting married, agree, and choose a simple ring together. I suppose the main reason I can't imagine the loud outbursts of a proposal is because I never grew up hearing such a story from MY mother... no ring box in the middle of a fancy restaurant, no kneeling on one knee, no captive audience to gauge your reaction and observe two strangers' decision (regardless of the outcome). When you think about it, proposals as a public spectacle have the potential to be extremely srange events. Probably wonderful for some, but awkwardly uncomfortable for others (particularly for those like myself, who don't like attention and most of the time happily avoid it).

And all this is coming from a GIRL'S (ahem, woman's) perspective, not a guy's. How ridiculous, right? I'm supposed to be DROOLING over wedding magazines, their very pages setting my ovaries on fire and instilling delusions of grandeur into my brain -- visions of my "dream wedding," whatever the hell that's supposed to be. No, I'm not that cynical (okay, maybe sometimes), I'm just... different. I guess, like many other things that I'm supposed to do and viewpoints I'm supposed to take as a woman, they are absent from my strange mind. And on that pleasant note, I leave you until next time.

R.